


I've Been Watching You (Dad Ain't That Cool?)

by orphan_account



Series: Old Ass Fics [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Established Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki, Future Fic, Gen, Kid Fic, M/M, Minor Jensen Ackles/Danneel Harris, Original Character(s), Original Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-03-01 17:13:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13299447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: No one ever told Jensen that having a kid is worse than owning a parrot.





	I've Been Watching You (Dad Ain't That Cool?)

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the country song Watching You by Rodney Atkins. It's adorable. So is the music video, you should check it out.
> 
> Fair warning: This is a pretty old fic, ngl. I'm trying to condense all my old stuff into one place. I still kind of like it though, so...yeah. That is all.

The first time Evan says a four letter word, Jensen about dies.

So does Jared, but that’s because he’s laughing his fool head off in the ensuing chaos and Jensen’s maybe got a  little too tight of a grip over his mouth to shut him up. Fingers curl around his and pry his hand away from Jared’s big dumb mouth. “Dude,” he manages to gasp out, “Your four year old just dropped the F-bomb in the middle of his preschool award ceremony. Tell me how that’s not fu-freaking hilarious.”

“Shut. Up,” Jensen grits through his teeth and sinks lower in his uncomfortable plastic school chair. “I am a horrible father.” Jared shoots him an amused look but claps a hand on his shoulder in solidarity.

“You are not a horrible father,” he says in a soothing voice, then slides a glance over to the makeshift stage where dozens of parents, teachers, nannies and mannies have gathered to watch their darling angels receive awards for learning their ABCs and colors or what the fu…freak ever. “You, ah, gonna go up there and collect him?” His tow-headed son had been led quickly off stage by his teacher after his (okay, kinda epic, he has to admit) faceplant and subsequent vocabulary lesson. Jensen sinks lower in his seat. 

“Do I have to?” he whines. It’s not one of his better moments. Jared seems to agree, if the raised eyebrow is any indication. Jensen holds out for another few seconds before groaning and rubbing his face in resignation. “Man, his teacher’s gonna kill me. Then Danneel’s gonna resurrect me and kill me again.”

Jared grins at him, dimples digging craters into his cheeks. “Probably.” 

Jared sucks at reassuring. A lot.

Jensen punches him in the arm and resolutely does not whimper as his knuckles crack. Six years after the end of Supernatural and the guy was still built like a brick …poo…house. Jensen? Maybe not so much. Directing doesn’t exactly require rock hard abs, nor do the occasional voice acting gigs he takes. “You’re coming with me,” he says decisively, and stands up. Jared follows without a word. His fellow parents in their row are throwing them dirty looks and not for the first time, Jensen regrets letting Danneel send Evan off to school so early. Clearly he wasn’t learning anything good from the other rich and famous offspring. He flashes them his million dollar ‘I’m-a-celebrity-you-love-me-really” smile and hopes for the best. He has a feeling Jared’s probably works better on them.

When they get to the side of the stage, Evan is being held tightly by Ms. Miranda, who looks alternately amused and beleaguered as the school’s principal gestures frantically. When the little boy sees them approach, he twists his arm out of her grasp and runs towards them. “Daddy! Unca Jay!”

Jensen bends on one knee and scoops the boy up in his arms. He has tear tracks on his chubby cheeks, and don’t  _ that _ just kick his papa bear instincts into full swing. He sends a scathing glare at the principal, then refocuses on Evan. Who is raising his bruised and scraped knee (the beginning of this whole debacle) up for his father’s inspection. Without a second thought Jensen kisses it; it’s been their tradition since before the kid could walk. He pulls back and takes his son by the shoulders.

“Kiddo, where the…where did you learn that word?” Evan gives him a look that reminds him too much of Danneel. He’s clearly wondering why on earth his poppa would even ask that question.

“You say it all the time.” Behind them, Jared coughs out a laugh into his hand. Jensen hopes he chokes. Ignoring his friend, he squeezes Evan tight and stands up. Ms. Miranda comes over to them and sends a small, reassuring smile towards his son. He knew there was a reason he liked her. 

“Mr. Ackles.” He shakes her hand as she takes a second glance at Jared. She gives him a small nod, cheeks flushing. Isn’t that typical, Jensen thinks as Jared sends her his charming, ‘aw-shucks’ smile. Jared is probably one of the more famous faces to stroll through the school. Since the end of their show, he’d rocketed to the top of the A list. 

“Mr. Ackles,” she repeats, refocusing quickly and pulling him back to the conversation too. “Could I speak with you for a moment?” Here it comes. Jensen bounces Evan a little to get his attention. His small hands are clenched tightly in his collar, face firmly entrenched in his father’s shoulder. Tearful green eyes shift up to stare imploringly at Jensen and that look right there? Is the reason Danneel used to joke about Jared’s involvement in Evan’s conception. It’s brutal.

It also gets Evan everything he wants, and he knows it. “Am I in trouble?” he asks in a wavering voice. Jensen sighs.

“Why don’t you let me talk to Ms. Miranda, buddy. Uncle Jared will take you outside, ‘kay?” He passes the boy over to Jared, who gives him a big grin.

“Wanna see my new car?” he asks. 

Evan nods enthusiastically. “What kind?” he asks as Jared carries him out of the cafeteria-cum-theatre, coolly ignoring the looks from the audience. If nothing else, the kid’s got a future in automobiles under Jared’s tutelage. 

Jensen turns back to Ms. Miranda with a small smile. “Uh. Shall we?” he says, gesturing. She throws him an eyebrow raise, but waves at him to follow her. They end up in her classroom, and aw, hell no he’s not gonna fit his six-foot frame into one of the teeny tiny chairs. Although the image of Jared trying is hilarious, if not exactly appropriate at the moment. 

Ms. Miranda seems to agree, not about the inappropriateness, since that’s only in his head, but about the chair situation, because she gestures to her own cheap rolly chair and perches on the edge of the desk herself. “So,” she starts. Jensen grimaces.

“Look, I am so sorry about today. I,” he pauses, then scratches the back of his neck. “We may not censor ourselves as much as we should at home. But we will! And this won’t happen again. I swear.” It better not. He’s not sure his sanity could handle something like that again. He squints his eyes shut in apprehension. “Please don’t expel my son.”

Ms. Miranda shifts, grips the edges of her desk and leans forward. “Can I be honest with you, Mr. Ackles?” He nods, more than a little worried. “That was the funniest shit I’ve seen all year.” 

Jensen…really doesn’t know how to respond to that. He chooses to stare in stupefied silence instead. She grins sheepishly back and shrugs. “Well, it was.” 

Jared would get along well with her, he thinks. It kind of terrifies him. This is the woman teaching his son? Ms. Miranda sighs and brushes dark hair behind her shoulder. “The other parents and teachers don’t agree.” His stomach swoops somewhere in the vicinity of his toes. “And unfortunately, neither does the principal.”

Great. His son is being expelled from preschool. He really is the worst father in the history of ever. “Suspension. One week, Mr. Ackles. And I suggest you introduce Evan to the differences between adult words and kid words.” 

Jensen lets out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. Suspension. He can handle suspension. He pushes himself out of the chair, takes Ms. Miranda’s hand in both of his, and gives her his very best ‘I’m just a good ol’ country boy slash actor slash director slash single father’ grin and wow, he really gets a lot out of mileage out of that smile. It sure seems to work on Evan’s teacher as she blushes and flicks her dark eyes to the side before back to him “Thank you,” he says, and means it. Her lips curl up and she leans forward a little. 

“Well, if you really want to thank me…” Oh yeah, he’s still got it. “Dinner with Jared Padalecki would be an acceptable bribe.” 

Son of a female dog. Jensen’s back to his paparazzi smile. “Pretty sure he’s not looking right now, sweetheart.” Ms. Miranda shrugs and smiles ruefully and hops off her desk. 

“And I’m married,” she says, “But it was worth a try. He’s totally on my list.” She flushes bright red as if suddenly realizing who she’s talking to. “I mean, not that you aren’t, because I had a major crush on Dean back in the day but you’re a parent and, I, um. I just. Oh god, I’m shutting up.” She’s hiding her head in her hands and the tips of her ears are red. 

“Always good to meet a fan?” he says slowly, and absolutely does not back away. Not at all. She flaps one hand at him awkwardly and rubs her face with the other.

“The last five minutes did not just happen. You can leave now,” she mumbles. She shoots him a look that dares him to disagree. “Tell Evan I’ll see him next Monday.” Jensen gives her a salute, a little glad to not be the most awkward one in the room anymore. For both their sakes, he beats a hasty retreat out to Jared’s truck, where he is leaning against the bed with Evan propped up next to him. As Jensen gets closer, he hears Evan ask in that too loud little kid way,

“So shoots okay? But no shit?” Jensen winces. God hates him. Or Jared does. Certainly the parents still loitering in the parking lot do, going by their ‘eat shoot and die’ glares. Jared catches sight of Jensen and has the good grace to look guilty. Forker. Evan continues unaware. “But shooting people’s mean Unca Jay, mama says so. Everyone goes potty though, right?” And darn if the kid doesn’t have a point. Sometimes it sucks having such a smart son. Jared obviously doesn’t know how to answer that either, judging by his gaping mouth and the useless fluttering of his giant paws. Jensen’s tempted to stand by for a bit and watch him suffer, but considering the fact that he has no idea what’s gonna come out of his little devil’s mouth next, he takes pity.

“Them’s the rules, kid,” Jensen breaks in, swooping up the little boy and basking in Jared’s ‘oh thank God’ expression. “They don’t have to make sense. And since you’re officially on vacation for the next week, we’ll have plenty of time to go over those rules.” Jared mouths ‘suspended?’ over Evan’s shoulder, then ‘bummer’ at Jensen’s slight nod. Evan doesn’t seem so upset. 

“Ice cream?” he asks hopefully, green eyes big and puppy-eyed. 

“Ha! No.” Jensen doesn’t feel bad about laughing in his son’s face. “This isn’t that kind of vacation, little Big Man. We’re going home.” Kid’s not getting ice cream until  _ after _ he’s promised not to say anything to his mom. And memorized a list of words never to be said again.

The drive home was only as exciting as Los Angeles traffic could make it. They spend the time eating McDonalds (because Jensen is a complete and total pushover) and discussing the dos and don’ts of the English language while Jared pipes up occasionally from the back and steals fries. When they get back to his apartment, he sends Evan to his room, which, as Jared points out, is completely pointless because the kid has pretty much every toy and gadget under the sun so it’s not exactly a hardship. He goes to the kitchen to grab a beer, cracking it open with the countertop like the hick he likes to pretend he still is and takes a deep pull before turning to Jared, who’s leaning against the doorway like he owns it. 

Jensen wordlessly tosses him another beer, since he’s obviously not planning on going home anytime soon. Jared takes a big gulp, belches, and grins. If the Academy could see him now. “Nice,” he says drily.

Jared gestures with the bottle. “You planning on telling Danneel?” 

“No. No, I’m really not.” Jared gives him a look. “He’s with me for two more weeks. She’ll never need to know.”  Jared takes another drink of his beer. Jensen collapses back against counter and groans into his hands. “Shut up. It’s none of your fucking – shit! I mean, aw damn it all to hell!” Jensen gives up and resolves to never speak again. Worst. Father. Ever.

Hands settle on his shoulders, the cool damp of a beer bottle bleeding through his shirtsleeve. He peeks up through his fingers. Jared is looking down at him with amused exasperation, hazel eyes fond and dimples just peeking out as he purses his lips. Jensen scowls mulishly; he hates that look. 

“You are not the worst father ever,” Jared repeats firmly, punctuating the words with a small shake. Jensen drops his hands, bemused. Did he just…?”

“And no, you didn’t say that out loud. I  _ know _ you, Jensen. And I know you’re pretending it’s no big deal, but you’re beating yourself up inside. Just like you did when you and Danni got divorced. But you weren’t the worst husband then, and you aren’t the worst father now.”

Damn it, Jensen really hates Jared sometimes. He’s a know-it-all, and smug, and half the time he makes Evan look mature and sometimes he freaking stinks to high heaven, but…

Jensen drops his head down to rest against Jared’s collarbone and his hands to his hips with a sigh. Sometimes he really kind of loves him. The douchebag. 

Jared’s arms slip around his shoulders, the soft clink of glass on marble just behind him before he’s wrapped in heat and Jensen just breathes. 

“You know,” Jared murmurs next to his ear after a few minutes of silence, “When I was little, my parents had a swear jar. Knowing you, and me, it could make for a pretty good college fund.”

Jensen pulls back and looks up with a raised eyebrow. “Swear jar?” he says dryly. Jared shrugs, smiles, and kisses Jensen lightly on the bridge of his nose. Jensen wrinkles it and pulls out of the embrace.

“Worked for momma and dad,” Jared says as he reaches past to pick up his beer and take another swig. He leans forward, caging Jensen in against the counter. Heat warms his belly, courses down his thighs and suffuses his chest in spite of the conversation. He lets his legs part as Jared nudges a thigh between them.

“Could work,” he concedes, letting his hands drift back to trim hips even as he tilts his own up. His eyelids flutter. Friction is good. Very good. What were they talking about?

“Could,” Jared agrees, lips pressing wet and open against Jensen’s pulse. “Won’t count in the bedroom though. That can be a swear-jar free zone.” 

Jensen grins even as he tilts his head to allow more access. Jared has a filthy mouth in bed. He’d be broke in a month, tops. “Thought it was for Ev’s college fund?” he asks innocently. Jared presses up with the thigh between his legs. “Okay,” he gasps, rocking forward. “Bedroom’s jar free. Let’s go there now.” It’s a small concession, anyways. There’s always the living room to make sure his son gets through college. And the bathroom, and the kitchen…

“Evan?” Jared husks, eyes dark with lust even as he’s pulling Jensen towards the aforementioned bedroom. 

“In time-out for at least an hour. Plenty of time.” Jensen pulls him in for a bruising kiss, then pulls back with a smarmy grin. “Come on baby, let’s fork.”  


**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: Ms. Miranda is a friend of mine, and she has assured me that yes, that is exactly how she would react.
> 
> Feel free to come play with me on Tumblr at: [kendallwith1l](http://kendallwith1l.tumblr.com/)


End file.
